Frontier 02: Randomness
by madjack89
Summary: A collection of parodies to sooth my ever-present writer's block. Done with characters from Frontier 02. Could end up containing some KouichixZoe in the future. Will also contain violence, along with humor eventually. Enjoy!
1. Never Dump a Yankee

**Frontier 02: Randomness**

**Never Dump a Yankee…**

_madjack89:_ Hi guys! Well, it's finally happened: I've created a fanfic specifically to get rid of my writer's block, hence the title. Okay, here's how this is gonna work. These will mostly be parodies of different things that I watch and read done with characters from Frontier 02. Some will be funny, some won't. This first one isn't really that funny unless you have a sick sense of humor, but luckily, some of you do! Yay! Alright, this is gonna be a parody of a fandub I saw on youtube a while ago of a scene from an anime called School Days. I've never actually watched this series before, but this scene made me randomly think of Kira and Taki, so I had to do it! The dialogue is taken specifically from the fandub, except that I naturally had to change the names. Also, the Japanese text on the phone in the original wasn't subbed, so I made that part up. Other than that, this is a direct parody of School Days, though you could also think of it as an alternate reality thing of what would happen if Taki dumped Kira for Zoe. Alright, enjoy!

_**Disclaimer:**_** I don't own Digimon Frontier, nor do I own School Days. I do, however, own Kira, who is my OC. Wow, that wasn't a funny disclaimer at all. I'm losing my touch!**

—

_A random hotel room, late at night…_

Takuya flipped open his cell phone, checking the text he'd just received. Surprisingly, he recognized the number as that of his ex-girlfriend. "Kira?" he muttered to himself, hastily opening the message. It was one word.

_Goodbye._

Suddenly, a chill went up Takuya's spine, as if someone were sneaking up behind him. He quickly turned around, and his suspicions were confirmed. There was Kira, running toward him. Wielding a large kitchen knife.

He'd already been stabbed in the stomach when he realized what was happening. He sucked in a breath as Kira pulled the knife out of him, eyes wide. Clutching his bleeding stomach, he staggered backward, falling to the ground. He quickly regained his senses and tried to crawl away, but Kira was already standing above him, raising her bloodied knife.

Takuya rolled painfully onto his back, staring fearfully into Kira's cold, merciless green gaze. He knew then that he would die.

"You're so cruel," Kira said quietly, bringing her knife down and stabbing Takuya again.

Through his blood-filled, gurgling cries as she repeatedly stabbed him, Kira remembered the happy times they'd shared. They'd been a perfect couple. Two peas in a pod. Until…

"You only cared about Zoe's happiness and your own!"

Blood spurted up in greater quantities as Kira stabbed Takuya harder, fueled by the memory of his betrayal.

As his vision began to blur for the final time, Takuya used the last of his strength to grab Kira's shirt with his bloodied hand.

Kira paused, watching Takuya's lips twitch in an attempt to speak. Finally he managed to say in a strangled whisper, "Ki…ra…"

Kira's eyes widened as Takuya's began to glaze over. His hand slowly slid off her shirt, leaving a trail of blood as it fell to the floor. Then it was over. Takuya was dead.

Kira stared at him for a moment, crouching in a pool of his blood. She watched, mesmerized, as leftover tears from his eyes mixed with the blood on his face, then continued their journey down his cheek.

Then she lowered her gaze, staring at her red-stained hands. At the red hand print on her shirt. At the knife still clutched in her fist.

This triggered another memory, the happiest of all. It was the memory of her first kiss. With Takuya.

That was when Kira truly comprehended what she'd done. She'd just killed Takuya. She'd stabbed him until he died. She'd loved him, but she'd killed him. No, she'd loved him enough to kill him.

Kira stood, glancing one more time at Takuya's sightless brown eyes before rushing from the room, knife and all.

About fifteen minutes later, Zoe stopped dead in the doorway, staring wide-eyed at Takuya's blood-covered corpse. Shocked, she leaned heavily against the doorframe, dropping her groceries. She didn't register the fact that, in the room's kitchenette, the tea kettle was whistling loudly as it had been for the past fifteen minutes.

—

_madjack89:_ There you have it! Short, sweet, and to the point!

_Kira:_ …Do you really think I'd do that?

_madjack89:_ Of course not! It's just a parody…well, actually, you did kind of do this, only Taki didn't end up dying…

_Takuya: pales_

_Kira: eye twitches_

_madjack89:_ Alright, see ya next time I get an idea and need to cure writer's block!


	2. Don't Hurt the Girl

**Frontier 02: Randomness**

**Don't Hurt the Girl**

_madjack89: _Hola, friends and chums! Here is the second lovely installment of F2Randomness, featuring Kouji and Zoe! And better yet, Kouji portrays a crazy person!

_Kouji: *glares*_

_madjack89:_ Alright, this will be a parody of one of my favorite Spike and Buffy scenes from the seventh season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer! For those of you that have seen Buffy, sit back and enjoy! For those of you that haven't, just picture this: Kouji is a newly re-ensouled vampire who has been driven crazy by guilt and a being called the First Evil and is currently living in the local school basement. Part of his guilt comes from the fact that he attempted to rape Zoe a few months back, prompting his search for his soul. Zoe discovered him a while ago and probes him on occasion for information, at this instance about a girl (Kira) who predicted her own death. So basically, Kouji's insane and Zoe is using him! (Hee!) Okay, let's see how this turns out!

_**Disclaimer:**_** I don't own Buffy and I don't own Digimon. I own Kira because she's my craaaazy OC! All dialogue from the following fanfiction is directly from Buffy (except for the changes in names). Alright, that covers it! Let's go!**

—

Zoe stepped into the dark basement of the school, shivering slightly. This place always gave her the creeps, especially since she'd had to fight so many monsters down in its dank depths. But she wasn't here to fight today. She'd come for information from a monster she'd fought viciously and kissed passionately (sometimes simultaneously).

She glanced left and right, finally spotting him huddled up in a corner. Kouji, the second vampire in existence with a soul. From the looks of it, he wasn't exactly relishing his fame.

He didn't acknowledge Zoe's approach, continuing instead to stare blankly at the ground almost as if he were entranced. As expected from living for a couple of weeks in a basement, he was a mess. His hair, which he was usually so meticulous about keeping in a neat and tidy ponytail, now had strands hanging loose all over the place. He wasn't even wearing his bandana. Zoe noticed it lying next to him, crumpled into a heap on the floor. The worst part was that he was shirtless, covering up with a mere black jacket despite the fact that it was so chilly in the basement (though that didn't particularly matter to a vampire). It wasn't that his being shirtless was bad, though. The problem was that Zoe could just barely catch a glimpse of the scars left by Kouji when he'd tried to claw out his own heart…

Zoe blinked quickly, dispelling these thoughts as she attempted to get Kouji's attention. She tried waving her hand in front of his face, then snapped at him, but he didn't respond.

Sighing in frustration, she said, "Kouji, what are you doing?"

Zoe assumed this wouldn't get Kouji's attention either, but after several moments, he muttered, "Nothing."

He didn't look up as he quietly continued, "If I don't move, if I don't think, if I don't listen to the voices, then I won't hurt…much."

Pushing back the pity she felt welling up inside her, Zoe continued in a sharp voice, "I need to ask you something."

"Don't," Kouji immediately responded, looking like he was trying to ignore her.

"There's a girl. She's in danger and she needs your help. Now." Zoe barely managed to conceal the urgency in her tone as she explained the situation to Kouji. Despite this, he didn't reply, though it seemed as if Zoe's presence was unnerving him due to his ragged breathing and twitchiness.

"Time is running out!" Zoe shouted, frustrated. Calming down slightly, she continued to explain, "It's Friday, the day Kira said she's going to die."

"I can't. I can't hear you," Kouji insisted despite the fact that his eyes kept darting between Zoe's face and the floor.

"Is there something evil in the school? Down here, maybe?" Zoe asked, beginning to sound desperate. "Kouji, please, do you know anything?"

Kouji sighed slowly, giving up his attempts to ignore Zoe. Then he nodded once in response to her question. "Yes. There's evil…down here…right here…"

Zoe gave him an inquiring look, wondering what he was getting at. "I'm a bad man," he continued, voice beginning to crack. "Kouji is a baaad man. I hurt the girl…"

Without warning, Kouji lifted his fist and began punching himself in the face. After three solid hits, Zoe managed to grab his arm and stop him. "Kouji, stop it!"

Startled, Kouji stared at Zoe, wide-eyed. "What did you do?" she asked him, still clutching his fist tightly.

"I hurt you, Zoe," Kouji replied as if it were obvious. "And I will pay. I am paying because I hurt the girl."

Zoe's expression softened, seeing the anguish written all over Kouji's face at the memory of what he'd done to her. "Kouji, no," she said gently, slowly lowering his arm. "It's not me. It's a different girl, okay? Her name is Kira Ishiko. Please, do you know anything specific?"

Kouji narrowed his eyes for a moment as if he were trying hard to concentrate on Zoe's question. Then he jerkily shook his head no. His eyes had grown wet with tears.

Zoe sighed, realizing that this had been for nothing. She quickly got to her feet, turned, and walked away before her pity got the best of her.

However, she'd only gotten about a foot away when Kouji suddenly called out, "Don't, don't leave me. Stay here and help me be quiet."

Zoe turned despite her better judgment and stared at Kouji for a moment. When she'd come, he'd been trying to keep the "voices" he heard at bay. His shield had cracked when she'd arrived, making Zoe realize that all she ever did was make his insanity worse. But still…he was a mess down here by himself. He probably hadn't had any blood in weeks. And he was suffering like this all alone.

Finally, Zoe came to a decision. "I think it's worse when I'm here," she said, quickly turning and walking away before she changed her mind.

Kouji lowered his gaze slowly as she left, neither looking disappointed nor upset. Then, to himself, he muttered, "Don't let them hurt the girl…"

—

_madjack89:_ There you have it! By the way, if you're wondering if all the chapters of this are gonna be short, it'll depend on what scene I choose to parody. For instance, the next Buffy parody between Kouichi and Zoe should be longer!

_Kouichi and Zoe:_ Next Buffy parody?

_madjack89:_ Yuppers! Alright, see ya next time!


	3. Amends

**Frontier 02: Randomness**

**Amends**

_madjack89:_ Hey guys! Remember that second Buffy parody I said I'd write? Well, here it is, starring Kouichi as Angel and Zoe reprising her role as Buffy! Aren't you guys excited?

_Kouichi:_ As long as you're not parodying a scene that would cause me to be evil again.

_madjack89:_ I'm not, I promise!

_Kouichi:_ Thank goodness.

_Zoe:_ He's not gonna be crazy, though, is he?

_Kouichi:_ What?

_madjack89:_ Not really.

_Zoe: _Good.

_Kouichi:_ Hang on, there was the chance I could've been crazy?

_madjack89:_ Yeah, kind of. Anyway, for those non-Buffy fans out there, here's the deal: this time, Kouichi is the vampire with the soul haunted (again) by the First Evil.

_Zoe:_ That First Evil really gets around, huh?

_madjack89:_ Pretty much. Anyway, instead of going crazy, Kouichi goes suicidal!

_Kouichi:_ …I'm really beginning to see why you picked me for this role.

_madjack89:_ Kouizumi!

_Kouichi:_ Yeah, that too.

_madjack89:_ Oh, and the story's set on Christmas Day. Alright, let's begin!

_**Disclaimer:**_** I don't own Digimon or Buffy…yeah, I can't think of anything witty to add. Sorry!**

—

Kouichi stood resolutely on the very peak of the hill, gazing out over the town below with sad eyes. It was almost dawn, which meant one thing. Almost time for him to die.

"Kouichi." He glanced back at the sound of his name, but quickly turned again when he saw who had said it. Zoe was now standing about a foot behind him, glaring at his turned back.

Without facing Zoe, Kouichi muttered partly to himself, "I bet half the kids down there are already awake, lying in their beds, sneaking downstairs, waiting for day…"

"Kouichi, please, I need you to get inside" Zoe pleaded, voice beginning to rise in panic. "There's only a few minutes left," she added, referring to the burning sun that would soon cast its rays over the quaint, if not monster-filled, California town below, sweeping over every exposed corner of the world, including the hill.

To Zoe's horror, Kouichi replied, "I know. I can smell the sunrise long before it comes."

"I don't have time to explain this," Zoe said exasperatedly, a sheen of tears coating her eyes as she tried to remain calm. "You just have to trust me. That thing that was haunting you…"

Kouichi suddenly turned, and Zoe could finally see just how hopeless he felt by his expression. "It wasn't haunting me. It was showing me."

"Showing you?" Zoe repeated, confused.

"What I am," Kouichi explained quietly.

"Were," Zoe corrected defiantly.

"And ever shall be," Kouichi retorted, infinite pain and guilt filling his eyes. "I wanted to know why I was back. Now I do."

"You don't know!" Zoe shouted angrily, remembering the day she'd found him, alive, after she'd sent him to hell months earlier. It had been a relief, if not a slightly heart-aching relief. And he was willing to give that up because the means that brought him back might have been evil? It wasn't like he had to listen to the First. "Some great evil takes credit for bringing you back and you buy it? You just give up?"

"I can't do it again, Zoe," Kouichi said with conviction. "I can't become a killer."

"Then fight it!" Zoe countered.

"It's too hard," he mumbled, shaking his head. His eyes were downcast with shame.

Fighting back panic, Zoe returned to her original argument. "Kouichi, please, you have to get inside."

"It told me to kill you," Kouichi stated softly, lost in his own dark thoughts. "You were in the dream, you know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again."

"I know what it told you," Zoe said, tone slightly gentler. She remembered quite well the dreams she'd shared with Kouichi, all involving flashbacks to his not-so-noble past. "What does it matter?"

"Because I wanted to!" Kouichi exclaimed, tears welling in his eyes as he confessed his darker desires. "Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you, and I know it'll cost me my soul, and a part of me doesn't care."

Kouichi paused, taking a long shaky breath. Then he continued, "I'm weak. I've never been anything else. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Zoe, it's the man."

Chuckling bitterly, Zoe replied, "You're weak. Everybody is. Everybody fails. Maybe this evil did bring you back, but if it did, it's because it needs you and that means that you can hurt it!"

Kouichi glanced at Zoe for a moment, and then lowered his gaze, turning his back on her.

Refusing to back down, Zoe continued, speaking from her heart, "Kouichi, you have the power to do real good, to make amends, but if you die now then all that you ever were was a monster!"

This time, Kouichi ignored her entirely, not even bothering to glance back at her as he gazed out over Sunnydale. (The name of the town, for non-Buffy fans.)

"Kouichi, please, the sun is coming up!" Zoe pleaded desperately.

"Just go," Kouichi ordered firmly.

"I won't!" Zoe cried boldly.

Suddenly, Kouichi turned to her, a crazy gleam showing in his eyes. "What, so you think this is simple? You think there's an easy answer? You could never understand what I've done! Now go!"

Pushing back her slight fear of Kouichi's change in demeanor, Zoe stated, "You are not staying here. I will make you—"

Zoe cut off her statement, grabbing onto Kouichi's arm tightly in order to drag him forcibly to the nearest shelter. However, Kouichi wouldn't let her.

"Leave!" he cried a bit desperately, shoving Zoe to the ground. Then, while she still lay on the ground, he crouched down in front of her, grabbing her by the shoulders and shaking her slightly hysterically. "Am I a thing worth saving, huh? Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone."

Tears streaming down her face, Zoe asked in an uncharacteristically small voice, "What about me? I love you so much, and I tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn't help."

Mustering all her super-Slayer strength, Zoe shoved Kouichi away from her, standing above him. There were tears falling down his cheeks, too, as he sat on the ground, staring with wide eyes at Zoe.

"And I hate it!" Zoe shouted, adding to her earlier statement. "I hate that it's so hard and that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did because you did it to me. God, I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. I can't."

Kouichi shook his head, eyes lowered. Then, standing up, he muttered, "Zoe, please, just this once…let me be strong."

"Strong is fighting," Zoe retorted, on a roll now. "It's hard and it's painful and it's every day. It's what we have to do and we can do it together. But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world then I don't know what can, but do not expect me to watch and don't expect me to mourn for you because…"

Zoe trailed off as a drop of water suddenly fell onto her nose. Looking up, she realized it wasn't water, it was snow. Kouichi looked up to, shocked that it was actually snowing in California, on Christmas Day, no less. The snow began to come down in larger amounts, but neither Zoe nor Kouichi attempted to move, too entranced by the sight of it.

—

"And that's how you make pencils float with magic!" Seiko finished happily, watching as her pencil actually began to hang in the air several inches above her bed, where she sat with her boyfriend, Kouji. She'd invited him to spend the night with her since her parents were out of town (they didn't do anything, calm down) and, to pass the time, Seiko, a fairly new witch, had decided to show Kouji some of her tricks.

Kouji (a werewolf in this role) smirked, leaning back against Seiko's bedstead. "That's pretty cool."

"Yeah!" Seiko agreed, smiling. Suddenly, her gaze was drawn to her window, in particular toward the fluffy white objects falling down outside. "Snow!"

—

"Well, would you look at that," Kira muttered, standing on the porch of Zoe's house and staring out at the snow falling over the town. "Either me and Zee need to go kick a snow demon's ass, or this is really freakin' awesome!"

—

"Hm, interesting," Shino said, watching the snow fall outside his window. "Wait, why am I drinking tea?" (Giles FTW!) "How am I like Giles? I'm not even British." (SHUT UP, GILES!) "Oh boy…"

—

JP woke with a start, suddenly feeling drops of cold water falling onto his face. Rubbing his eyes blearily, he realized that it was actually snowing. On the one night when he slept out in his backyard to get away from his drunken relatives.

Grumbling, he pulled his sleeping bag over his head, trying to escape the frozen drops of water.

—

Kouichi and Zoe walked slowly through the empty streets of Sunnydale, hand in hand. There was no need for them to hurry now. The snow clouds completely covered the sun, and would continue to cover it for the rest of the day. Kouichi was safe.

And he was ready to face the world again. To make amends.

—

_madjack89:_ Wow, how did that fit perfectly with Kouichi and Zoe?

_Kouichi: _*_shrugs*_

_JP:_ What was up with a bunch of us randomly appearing at the end there?

_madjack89:_ Those scenes were in the original Buffy episode, so I decided to keep them there and add some of you guys in! I (obviously) made up the dialogue for those parts (and some of the things that happened in them) just to give you guys a little more to do! The earlier dialogue, however, came directly from the episode, because it's better than anything I could come up with!

_Kira:_ Aw, don't be like, Madjack.

_madjack89:_ Eh…anyway, I've got two ideas for some upcoming parodies, only I don't know which to do first, so I'll ask you guys! Which would you rather read first: another, funnier parody of a Buffy episode with a lot of the same Frontier 02 characters reprising roles, or a parody of a certain video game involving hearts?

_Kouji:_ What video game…oh.

_Takuya:_ You really don't know much about video games, do you?

_Kouji:_ I'm sorry I'm not an otaku.

_madjack89:_ You're just jealous and you know it!

_Kouji: *rolls eyes*_

_madjack89:_ Alright, tell me what you want next and I'll write it! See ya!


	4. One By One

**Frontier 02: Randomness  
One By One**

_madjack89:_ Hey guys! Now, I know I promised I'd work on a Kingdom Heart's parody for the next segment of this compilation, but the other day while watching the second to last episode of Slayers Next, I saw one of the most touchingly powerful scenes I've ever seen in an anime. In the scene, this king of all monsters wants Lina to use a spell that will most likely end up destroying the whole world. He threatens that he'll kill all of her companions if she doesn't cooperate, and at this point I thought, "Yeah, like I haven't heard THAT one before." But then he surprised me by actually killing Amelia and proceeding to kill the rest of Lina's friends, one by one. Of course, right after this scene you find out that there's still a shot to save them, but during the scene I was completely rendered speechless. It just…I'm not sure how to describe it, but it definitely affected me. So, to honor this scene, I've decided to parody it using the Legendary Warrior kids and Lucemon!

_Everyone: _…

_Kouji:_ Not surprised.

_madjack89:_ The reason it's not Ilsemon is because in the original scene, the monster that was killing them was in the form of a little boy who liked to toy around with people's lives. Sound familiar?

_Lucemon:_ Heh, finally I make an appearance in one of your stories, Madjack.

_madjack89:_ Yup, the creepy child has landed! Alright, enjoy the parody! (BTW, this won't be a direct parody like the last three, since Lina only had five other people with her and I've got nine others to work with. But it'll be along the same lines.)

_**Disclaimer:**_** I don't own Digimon or Slayers, because if I did, Zelgadis would have been voiced by Crispin Freeman long before episode 18. But you're cool too, Daniel Cronin! Don't give up! (Now I sound all corny…)**

—

Lucemon smiled darkly at the ten children standing below him, looking just like ants ready to be crushed. Turning to the only ant that mattered, he said, "Are you ready to unleash that hidden power of yours?"

"Uh, definitely not, and nothing you say will convince me otherwise," Takuya replied, putting up a slightly cocky front for his enemy. Really, what could Lucemon do? Kill him? If he wanted Takuya's power unleashed, that was not the brightest idea.

But Lucemon had other ideas in mind. "If you don't do as I say, I'll simply kill each of your worthless friends until you decide to cooperate. And you know I will."

Takuya flinched involuntarily, but his friends didn't seem quite as fazed as he did. "Well yeah, you could kill us, but considering we're not just gonna lie down dead at your feet, you're in for a fight, little boy," Kira growled, fists raised.

"But that's exactly what you will do," Lucemon muttered, holding out his hand. Suddenly, nine small yellow balls floated above Lucemon's outstretched palm as if he'd summoned them to him. Glancing at each of the children's shocked expressions, he found his first victim. Taking one of the balls between his thumb and pointer finger, he quietly said, "Goodbye," then crushed the ball with little effort, it was so fragile. Or perhaps he was so strong that the ball seemed fragile.

Either way, as the ball broke into pieces, Dai felt a sudden tremor run through his body. It felt as if everything inside him had just started rebelling against his body with such force that he began to writhe on the ground in agony.

"Dai!" Hotaru shouted, instantly dropping to a crouch in front of Dai and pulling his cousin onto his lap. The others quickly surrounded the two, bewildered expressions on all their faces. What had Lucemon done?

"I'm okay!" Dai insisted, though everyone could tell he wasn't due to the tremors still racking his body. "I'm fine, I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm—"

Dai was suddenly cut off as his body convulsed once more, then went completely limp. "Dai?" Hotaru said weakly, shaking his cousin as if to wake him from sleep. But even Tommy could tell that Dai wasn't sleeping. His eyes were too wide, too murky, too…deathlike. No one could deny it. Dai was dead.

It didn't stop Hotaru from trying to bring him back, though. "Dai, snap out of it!" he shouted, tears forming at the corners of his eyes. "You aren't supposed to die yet. You were gonna live to be 105, remember? You told me you wanted to beat the odds, so you can't give up now! Please Dai, you have to wake up!"

Dai remained limp, head lolling back and forth lifelessly as Hotaru tried to shake the life back into him. But as much as he tried, Hotaru couldn't save his cousin now.

Ignoring the broken sobs behind him, Kouji turned to glare at Lucemon floating so calmly above them. "What the hell did you just do?"

"I told you," Lucemon taunted, focusing on Takuya instead of Kouji. "Until you do what I want, you'll get to watch all of your friends die, one by one."

Takuya looked around at each of his friends, then down at the body cradled in Hotaru's arms. "No…"

"You monster!" Zoe suddenly screamed, eyes blazing at Lucemon as she raised her D-Tector. "Spirit—"

"Zoe, stop!" Takuya shouted, but it was already too late. Lucemon smirked and crushed a second ball between his fingers, cutting Zoe's exclamation off. A violent tremor coursed through her body as she began to fall forward, eyes wide with shock. Kouichi was there instantly, catching her before she hit the ground. This made little difference, for a moment later, she slumped over in his arms.

The sudden weight of Zoe's body along with the gravity of what had just happened brought Kouichi to his knees, face hidden against Zoe's hair. "Zoe," he mumbled, holding her body tighter against his own to hide his sudden gush of tears.

"Zoe…" Takuya couldn't believe this. It couldn't be happening. Dai and Zoe…dead?

"Hotaru, wait!" Takuya was brought back momentarily by Shino's shout. It took his brain a second or so to process that Hotaru was rushing at Lucemon, looking every bit murderous.

"You son of a bitch!" Hotaru cursed, his rage and anguish plain in every syllable. "I'll kill you!"

He didn't get the chance. Lucemon crushed a third ball, smiling devilishly. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

From where the others stood, it looked as if Hotaru had merely tripped and fallen flat on the ground. But he didn't get back up.

"Oh god, no," Takuya muttered fearfully, taking a few steps back. "Not Hotaru, too."

"Taki, snap out of it!" Kira yelled, gripping Takuya's shoulders firmly. "It's not over yet!" Despite her confident words, a sheen of tears coated Kira's eyes. "We can beat him!"

"What did I say about making promises you can't keep?" Lucemon scolded, sighing heavily. "Now you need to be punished."

Takuya's eyes widened as Lucemon prepared to crush another yellow ball, crushing the life out of another one of his friends. But Kira was more than a friend. "No, not Kira! Please, not Kira!"

"Oops," Lucemon said, pretending that he'd accidentally broken the ball. The smile on his face said otherwise. "Looks like I broke another one."

It seemed as if Kira fell in slow motion, landing against Takuya's chest. Takuya was too stunned to hold her up, so she continued to grip his shoulders as best she could as shudders coursing through her body. Then, smiling weakly, she said, "Taki, go kick that kid's ass." She shivered once more, then her hands slipped from Takuya and her body fell sideways, landing with a loud thump on the ground.

Takuya couldn't believe this. It had to be a bad dream. Kira didn't just…

"No…" Tommy said quietly, trembling with fright. "Everyone…"

"Damn," Kouji cursed under his breath, glancing around at the growing body count. "This is not good."

"No shit it's not good," JP muttered, chuckling weakly. "We're dropping like flies."

"You're actually being crushed like ants," Lucemon corrected as yet another ball was squashed in his grip.

This time, JP dropped to the ground, smiling despite the obvious pain he was in. "Touché," he managed to utter before the light left his eyes.

"Damn it, JP!" Kouji cried angrily, whipping around to face Lucemon. "You damn coward! If you're so confident in yourself, then why not come down here and face us?"

"Kouji, stop agitating him!" Kouichi yelled, not wanting to have to witness Kouji's death as well.

Lucemon glanced at Kouichi. "I never congratulated you for, in essence, defeating me before, so I'll reward you by letting you die together."

Instead of one ball, Lucemon took two between his fingers, cracking them both at once.

Takuya was frozen with horror at the sight of both Kouji and Kouichi dropping to the ground, giving each other one last, meaningful look before their lives were extinguished. "Guys…"

Shino closed his eyes, trying to stay rational for the sakes of his two remaining friends. If he was going to die, he figured he'd try to take Lucemon down with him. At least then Tommy and Takuya wouldn't need to die, too.

Doing the only thing he could think to do, Shino stepped forward, raising his hands in a gesture of surrender. "Lucemon, there's no need to kill me. It's not as if I've ever felt particularly attached to anyone here. I was just sucked into this whole mess unwillingly."

"So you don't care about your friends' fates?" Lucemon asked, seeming intrigued. "You'd be willing to just walk away from all this?"

"That's right," Shino muttered, bowing slightly. However, while he bowed, he reached inside his jacket and grabbed his D-Tector, which he'd hidden there for easy access once he'd gotten close enough to their enemy. Whipping out the device, he'd almost managed to start the Evolution process when he heard a sharp snap, followed by a paralyzing tremor pulsing through him. "Damn…so close."

"Shino!" Tommy cried, racing forward with tears in his eyes. Crouching by his dying friend, he felt completely helpless. He hadn't been able to stop anyone from getting killed and soon, he'd be joining them…

"Tommy," Shino said, voice barely above a whisper. "Listen; I know you're scared and that you're probably going to be killed in a second, too, but you have to…convince Takuya…to…fight…"

Shino's voice faded and died along with the rest of him, but Tommy knew what he'd wanted him to do. He had to get Takuya to fight back against Lucemon, for all of them.

Tommy glanced back at Takuya, who returned his gaze with fear in his eyes. "Tommy…don't."

Ignoring him, Tommy glared up at Lucemon, hands balling into fists. "Do you really believe that this is all just a game? Do you really think that life is just something for you to toy with? Well, it's not! Life is something precious and, as much as I hate to admit it, even your life is precious! How can you kill without feeling like this? It's horrible! You're horrible!"

"Are you quite finished?" Lucemon asked, sounding bored. The last yellow ball was nestled between his fingers, ready to be crushed.

"No!" Takuya screamed, rushing forward. "Don't kill him! He's just a kid! Please, don't kill Tommy! Please!"

"Maybe I am just a kid," Tommy muttered, eyes glistening with determination. "But I'm not afraid of you, Lucemon!"

Lucemon chuckled softly. "You should be." Then the last ball shattered to pieces.

"Tommy!" Takuya cried, diving and catching his little friend before he hit the ground. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he watched Tommy twitch and convulse painfully. "Tommy, I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry…"

Tommy took several shuddering breaths before saying, "If you're sorry, then kill him. Kill Lucemon for us. It's up to you…"

Takuya's eyes widened as Tommy's dimmed. Kill Lucemon? Yes. That was what he had to do. It was the only way his friends would be able to rest in peace. He needed to unleash that power of his. He had to somehow control it. He had to destroy Lucemon with it. For Tommy. For everyone.

Laying Tommy's body gently on the ground, Takuya rose slowly to his feet, glowing with a bright, fiery aura. Lucemon smiled wickedly. "It looks like you're finally ready to cooperate."

Takuya glared up at Lucemon, eyes blazing with unconcealed fury. "I'm finally ready to kill you."

—

_madjack89:_ Wow…writing that actually made me feel really bad! Remind me never to kill all you guys off at once!

_JP:_ What was up with the little yellow death balls?

_madjack89:_ Oh, that's just how the monster killed Lina's friends in the original scene, and I couldn't think of a better way to do it!

_JP:_ …I see.

_Takuya:_ …Madjack?

_madjack89:_ Yeah, Taki?

_Takuya:_ …Never do that to me. Please.

_madjack89:_ Oh, don't worry, buddy! That's a little too cruel, even for me!

_Kouji:_ Yet you loved the original scene that did this same thing?

_madjack89: *sweatdrop*_ Well, remember to R&R, guys! See ya!


	5. Punishment

**Frontier 02: Randomness  
Punishment**

_madjack89:_ Hey guys, it's that time again! Time for more randomness! Woohoo!

_Kouji: *sigh*_ What are we parodying this time?

_madjack89:_ Higurashi!

_Everyone:_ …

_Kouji:_ You're joking, right?

_madjack89:_ No, no I am not.

_Kouji:_ …I need some aspirin…

_madjack89:_ Aw, quit your whining! You're not even in this one-shot.

_Kouji:_ Oh, okay then.

_madjack89:_ But Kouichi is!

_Kouichi:_ What?

_Kouji:_ …Aspirin…

_Kira:_ So, is Chief just gonna go crazy and kill us all or something?

_Kouichi:_ I…but I…

_madjack89:_ Calm it down, Kouichi. You don't have to commit any murders today.

_Kouichi: *sighs in relief*_

_Takuya:_ If Kouichi's not gonna be the crazy one, who is?

_madjack89:_ Oh, you'll see…you'll see…

_**Disclaimer:**_** Okay, do you guys really think I own Digimon or Higurashi? Do you think I'm Akiyoshi Hongo or Ryukishi07? Well, I'm not. So there.**

—

_"Since you missed club today, we concocted a little game for you with these ohagi Kouichi's grandma made. One of them was made by me. Guess the right one and you win! Guess wrong and…well, you know what happens."_

It all seemed so innocent. Why did this happen? Why…?

_"Oh, and one more thing before we go…__**please DON'T be absent from school tomorrow.**__"_

The way their eyes would suddenly change, and their tones of voice would become harsh; it almost seemed like they were possessed. But of course, that was impossible. There are no such things as demons. No one gets "spirited away." Still, their mood swings were unexplainable and frightening. And then there were those ohagi…

_"A…a needle…?"_

They tried to kill me with that sewing needle. Kouichi even confessed to it.

_"We didn't mean to hurt you! It…it was just supposed to be a joke…Takuya thought it would be funny…that it would make you smile again…"_

They thought sticking a needle into my food was funny? They weren't trying to hurt me? These were blatant lies told straight to my face. I realized then that my two friends really were trying to kill me, and I had no idea why. But I was ready for them. I'd taken precautions; carrying around a baseball bat for protection was just one of them. Still, I couldn't have predicted what Takuya did next.

_"Don't worry…there's no chance in hell I'm gonna let you transfer. Got it?"_

That word "transfer." I'd already come to identify it as synonymous with "spirited away." So, had I been pegged as the next victim in our village's yearly curse? From what Takuya had said, there was no doubt of this. But he wasn't going to let me transfer…was transferring a fate even worse than death? Were he and Kouichi trying to do me a favor by killing me? Well, I wasn't about to die without receiving any answers to my questions. But Takuya…

_"You're just gonna have to trust me for now."_

…following me…

_"Friends need to be able to trust each other."_

…with that giant cleaver.

_"Zoe…"_

Zoe shot up so fast that her head was spinning with dizziness, so it took her a few seconds to figure out where she was. All these familiar articles of clothing, her books, her baseball bat…she was in her room. But how in the world had she gotten here? The last thing she remembered was running through the woods, with Takuya's crazed laughter bouncing around the trees…

"Hey Zoe. Welcome back!"

His voice caused all of Zoe's limbs to stiffen simultaneously. In her haste to identify her surroundings, she hadn't even noticed Takuya sitting next to her futon, a cheerful grin plastered on his face. She could tell the hyper energy in his expression was mostly for her benefit, as beneath this there was a look of genuine concern for her. Zoe would have been moved had she not seen through her friend's act long ago.

"What are you doing here?" she growled distrustfully, scooting closer toward the wall at her back; she'd noticed her bat was placed against the dresser that stood just inches behind her. If she could grab that bat…

A sad look cross Takuya's face, but it was quickly masked by the cheerfulness. "You hit your head earlier and ended up passing out, so I brought you back to your house. Since your parents are out of town right now, I decided to call—"

Suddenly, there was a soft knock-knock at Zoe's door, practically causing her to jump out of her skin. Takuya, however, wasn't fazed. "Come on in, Kouichi. She's awake now."

Zoe's door slowly slid open and in walked Kouichi, a small relieved smile on his face. "Thank goodness," he muttered, taking a seat next to Takuya. "I was starting to worry."

"Oh, there's nothing to be worried about," Takuya said, waving off Kouichi's concern. "Zoe's no pushover, after all!"

For a moment, just one moment, Zoe felt as if she'd been transported back in time. She was the new transfer student again, and these were the two boys who were trying to make her feel at home in this mountain village. They would go on picnics to the shrine, where they would meet up with JP and Tommy and have a great time. On school days, they would stay later than everyone and participate in club activities, playing game after game and punishment game after punishment game. She'd laugh and truly be happy for the first time…

"So anyway, did you call the coach yet?"

Takuya's question shattered Zoe's fragile illusion. "Who's the coach?" she asked, unfamiliar with this name. Had she met any coaches since she'd moved to this village? None whom she could recall.

Kouichi shot her a blank look. "Zoe hasn't met the coach?" he muttered more to himself than to anyone else. "Huh, I guess she's still not familiar with everyone in the village yet."

"Stop talking like I'm not even here!" Zoe snapped, causing Kouichi to flinch a bit.

Takuya, however, managed to cover for him. "You've been getting into the habit of practicing your baseball swings a lot lately, Zee. Well, when the coach hears that, he'll be really excited!"

Kouichi nodded, agreeing with Takuya's statement. Zoe just glared at the two. "Stop dodging the question and tell me who the hell this 'coach' guy is!"

"The coach is the coach!" Takuya replied, giggling at his own inside joke.

Zoe was not amused. "Who is the coach? Tell me right now!"

"Well…" Kouichi began hesitantly, fueled by Zoe's apparent need for an answer. "He's…I'm not really sure how to put it…"

"He's just the coach!" Takuya stated, descending into another fit of laughter. This time, Kouichi joined in, and the two cackled away at their jokes while Zoe's paranoia grew.

_Why won't they answer me?_ Zoe wondered, reaching back until her fingertips were touching the bat. _I should wait and find out who the coach is…I want to know the truth behind the murders…but not if I end up dead, too! Just give me a reason, I dare you two…_

"Hey, I just remembered something!" Takuya announced in his falsely happy voice. "We've still got a punishment game to administer, since Zee never guessed which ohagi I made."

"Punishment…?" Zoe's voice squeaked on the last syllable of the word. They were going to play a punishment game with her now? It hardly seemed like an appropriate time for it…unless this was more than a childish game.

Kouichi seemed to agree with Zoe's thoughts about bad timing, but he just shrugged. "If you think we should," he mumbled, rummaging through one of his pockets as he stood. "You're lucky I brought this with me."

Zoe would have asked what mysterious item Kouichi had brought had she not suddenly been grabbed from behind. "What in the—?" Within the scope of her peripheral vision, Zoe could see Takuya kneeling behind her, his arms wrapped securely around her shoulders. No matter how much wriggling she tried, she knew she wouldn't be able to break from her friend's hold. But this fact barely held Zoe's attention. What she was truly concentrated on were Takuya's eyes. As suddenly as always, they had changed. No longer were his pupils round; they were long and slit like a cat's. And unlike a normal human eye, his gaze reflected no light from the lamp on Zoe's ceiling. His whole expression was devoid of any emotion save one; homicidal delight.

The blonde turned, hoping to find solace in her other friend's gentle face, but she had no such luck. Kouichi had changed as well. His dark, cat-like eyes were fixed on the item clutched in his hands, and as he fiddled with his treasure, a demonic smirk crossed his face. "Okay, it's ready."

Zoe's eyes grew wider and wider as Kouichi opened his fingers, revealing what was clutched there; a syringe filled with a mysterious clear liquid. As her friend lifted the needle, it dawned on Zoe what they planned to do. Takuya and Kouichi were going to inject her with whatever substance that syringe contained. What was it she'd found out about the death of that photographer? They'd found his body after the festival, and autopsies had confirmed that he'd clawed out his own throat. There were no traces of drugs in his system, but the police still suspected a mystery drug in the murder…

This was it. They were finally going to do it. Takuya was going to hold her down while Kouichi injected this "mystery drug" into her veins. They'd probably watch with those cold cat eyes as Zoe dug into her own flesh, clawing away until she reached the jugular and tore out her life's blood, letting it spill out across her floor…

"No!" She refused to let it end this way. "Get off of me!" Somehow, she had to stop this. "Don't do this!" She had to protect her life, now that she'd figured out so much. The police had to know!

"C'mon, Zee, don't fight it." As she wrestled for freedom, Zoe felt Takuya's breath in her ear. She flinched away, but he only held her tighter. "Just take your punishment and get it over with…heh heh heh…"

"It'll be over before you know it." Kouichi's hand was descending toward her arm. She pulled it back, but he just reached out and grabbed it, forcing the elbow open. He was really going to do it. Her friends…her best friends were going to drug her… "Trust me on that."

_"Mornin', Zee!"_

My gaze was trained on the needle as it crept closer and closer to my skin. How had it come to this? Why was I the one chosen to be killed in this way?

_"I was just wondering, Zoe…would you like to join our club?"_

What had happened to those peaceful, sunny days? Why couldn't I reclaim them? I wanted my friends back.

_"Zoe!"_

I was going to expel these demons that had ruined everything.

_"Zoe…"_

I would not be the one to die!

_"I'm sorry."_

My arm twisted out of Takuya's grip.

—

Kouichi was already dead. That was a likely conclusion. Takuya couldn't see very well anymore; she had accidentally smashed her lamp on the back swing. For whatever reason, she'd gone after Kouichi first, giving him a good crack across the skull before descending on him. The only consolation was that her first blow had probably been the killing blow. Their friend hadn't felt any pain as her frenzied beating sent splashes of blood across the room, making it look to Takuya like one of those modern art paintings with the colors thrown haphazardly across the canvas. Well, if he could see.

But he couldn't, it was dark inside and out. The moon shown without providing much illumination; Takuya could just faintly see the outline of his friend as she swung her bat again and again, landing blows across Kouichi's already mutilated corpse. He'd tried to stop her at first, so she'd lashed out at him, breaking the bones in his arms against the hard metal surface of her baseball bat. Seeing her practice, he still never would have guessed her swings had so much power. He could no longer feel his arms; there had been pain at first, but watching his friend's crazed frenzy had caused him to go numb. He was going to die. He knew this.

Finally, her senseless corpse brutalization was over, and she turned to Takuya. Even in the low light, Takuya could see her eyes; the pupils had shrunk to pinpricks. She was hysterical, insane, but she was also frightened. He could see tears in her eyes. Even as she killed Kouichi, perhaps she had felt some regret. Maybe Takuya could tap into that regret.

So he smiled as she approached, her teeth clenched, holding her bat tightly above her head. He grinned the same grin he'd greeted her with since the day they'd met. He tried not to look at the puddle of dark liquid making its slow way across the floor. He tried not to see Kouichi's wide, blank eyes. None of that mattered. Now, it was just him and her. As always, he was determined to win.

"C'mon, Zoe…don't you trust me?"

—

Light…there's so much light…

Oh, of course. It's morning! Time for me to get up and get ready to meet Takuya for school. Kouichi will join us along the way, and then we'll see JP and Tommy when we get there. It'll be another perfect day in this perfect little village. Perfect…

It wasn't so perfect.

Her room was practically coated in dried blood.

There were two bodies lying in the middle of her floor; one belonged to Kouichi, the other Takuya. They were covered in blood as well. Their own blood.

Zoe was sitting against the wall, unable to comprehend what she was seeing. But there was something clutched in her hand, so she looked down.

In her grip was the baseball bat she'd found in a locker at school. Once it had been grey. Now it was dark red, smeared with red, caked with red. Blood. Her friends' blood. On her bat.

_Punishment…_

—

_madjack89:_ Wow, I really got experimental with that one.

_Zoe:_ Wait, I went crazy and killed Takuya and Kouichi?

_Kira:_ If I had to kill Taki in these things, so do you.

_Takuya:_ _*shivers*_ Oh geez, don't remind me about that…

_Kouichi:_ Heh…wow, that was…wow…

_madjack89:_ Yeah, the way I wrote this was kind of weird, but I wanted to try a little edgier style of writing, especially toward the end. Tell me what you thought of it!

_Kouji:_ I have one question before we go.

_madjack89:_ Ask away!

_Kouji:_ I'm Shion and Kouichi is Mion?

_madjack89:_ …See ya later! Don't forget to R&R! And yes, I'm still working on the Kingdom Hearts parody, but it's gonna be longer than these short little things, so be patient!


End file.
